Running The Race

Super high and Super down.. I have been going though these motions for a few weeks now.. It is .. not so hot..

Satan hates me.. He really does.. He tries so hard to keep me down and sometimes I just feel like giving in.. Then I realize I have done all this to myself..

I have never been depressed I don't think.. Like seriously depressed.. Now and days I feel that.. hard.. sometimes I just don't feel faithful at all.. Sometimes I really have to yell Jesus to get some relief.. to call on Him..

I have made some mistakes.. mistakes I will have to live with.. I wish I could bounce back quick but it seems like its easier said then done..

I want my old self back! I want to help people again... I want to strive to get to know my creator.. there are things in my path.. I need his strength now more then ever..

Aside from this I have learned what Love is.. I'm such a fool.. an absolute fool and every time I think about it.. it renders me aimlessly retarded.. I am such a selfish jerk .. I am such a .... I typed something here but I took that back..

I meant everything I said..


Please everyone pray for me.. I know I will come out of this funk.. it will just take time.. and I have to put effort into coming out of it..

QUIT BEING SELFISH KEVIN... QUIT THINKING ABOUT YOURSELF! BE HAPPY FOR EVERYONE KEVIN...!

I wrote an entry a week ago and thought I was healed.. doesn't happen that quickly..

Kevin you messed up..
but Kevin.. You live you learn..
Be happy.. be selfless..

I need to get away.. but there is no running away from this.. I must face this head on.. and deal with it the best way I can.. the biblical way..

Have Mercy on me Lord.. Forgive me..